You guys, if you ate cream cheese and navy beans couldn't make a mess!
Isn't that a beautiful line? It came to me today while driving along. It just came to me like that, fully formed.
Of course I wanted to preserve it as quickly as I could, so I reached for my phone. Then I remembered you're not supposed to text anything while driving, so I didn't. I just repeated it to myself a few times, but I had my phone out.
Instead of texting it, I wanted to record it on the voice recorder that comes with phones. But you have to type about as many buttons to get to it as you would texting. And I figured if a policeman pulled me over he wouldn't be sympathetic to the distinction. I've seen enough reality police shows to know you can't talk them into anything.
But I kept my phone out because I knew that sooner or later I'd get stuck by a red light. And wouldn't you know it, all the lights that normally turn red as soon as I'm approaching stayed green, allowing me to cruise through town unimpeded, very strange.
Finally, though, my "luck" ran out, and I quickly got the voice recorder going. Then I had a momentary mental block, but, again, it was just a second. I recorded the line I believe four times and that kept it preserved long enough for me to get my errands done and to get home and write it out in all the beauty you see above.
I made a very rare Tweet of it, rare for me, although that version, to be honest, had a comma after "beans," and looking at it tonight it seems to me it shouldn't have. So I tweeked my Tweet and this is the version without the comma after "beans."
The taunt, of course, is that I don't think the major industrial powers can make anything, as in manufacturing. Yes, yes, I know they can make a lot of things, but I guess I'm taunting them about the inferior quality of their shoddy goods if you compare them to what the Residential Industrial Movement can make. We're making things with the greatest quality, literally not resting until we get it as good as we can.
So I guess I'm infantilizing them a little, thinking of someone who can make a real mess in their pants, if you've ever taken care of little kids. Feed them cream cheese and navy beans and stand back! But the major industrial powers, I'm saying, in a great example of trash talking, couldn't even make a mess, given the ingredients that would work even for babies!