I Gotta Be Me

No. 22 of 31 - Thermometer series

I believe there's a saying like this, “The measure of man is man himself.” Or maybe it goes, “Who knows the measure of a man more than himself?” There’s a saying something like that involving “the measure of a man” and “himself.” They used to measure me, so anything's possible, but that was just for shoes, pants, and shirts. They never measured the soul, although, I guess to be fair, I did go to Sunday School. So there's a lot of wondering about yourself and various jabs at answers.

So am I OK? I feel like I've put the pieces together, even drastically, with my own insights together with modern psychology and can not only say “I’m OK, You’re OK” but, invoking Tony the Tiger, “I’m Grrrreat, You’re Grrrrreat!” I say some version of that, and whether I believe it, that’s a different story. I definitely believe we as the subject are too close to the subject to objectively know whereof we speak in evaluating the self. But what other perspective can we have, especially when we restrict ourselves with a mechanical approach and a more or less superficial frame of reference? So called objectivity

It might sound trite to say it, but it’s likely true, we have to transcend somehow from within, seeing ourselves as more than skin, bone, guts, with a watchman on top of a spine. I can be very ethereal in thought. But not as much as I want to get, like in the Transfiguration. That’d be great. Say you’re sitting there, you’re transfigured, but while you’re sitting there, you’re also able to be in the kitchen, or over at the coffee shop, taking in refreshments. You run home or text to see how things are going in your chair. You’re so ethereal and so wonderfully transfigured that you’re able to text back that you’re doing fine. With the weirdest part being that you only have one phone but are somehow able to text back and forth while apart!

OK, let me draw a few at least superficial lessons from this as it applies to the thermometer drive. Which is weird, because the thermometer drive is the most important thing in my life at the present moment. Look at me sitting here typing this in a fever, while I’m across town having coffee. But I’m not in a coffee shop, no no no. I’m at a park, standing there waiting for the dew to dry so I can sit on the bench, while another manifestation of my consciousness is making the coffee in a French press pot and preparing to rush it to the park. As I sit here I was only momentarily disturbed as that I grabbed the keys from the table next to me. I hope they have a great day and that I accomplish a lot.

To drive the point completely home, or completely to the space between here and the park, or completely at the park — wherever I actually am — I gotta be me! I gotta be me! What else could I be? Something to see or maybe not. Just a bunch of ethereal spirits, eternal playthings in league with all that is, driving me completely bonkers, the more they’re busy playing around when there’s actual work here on earth to be done.

I have plenty of compatriots helping with the blog. The men’s organization, always pointing at me, going “You da man.” And the ladies aid, a more practical group of gals I’ve never seen. How the men ever happened to marry these particular women, I’ll never know. Maybe someday -- say I live till the 10th anniversary or 20th of this present-day blog drive, and we’re reliving old times -- they’ll tell me the full story: “Where did I meet Missy? I couldn’t tell you this 20 years ago, but she was a complete doll.”

Hit that thermometer! Things are going great! I'm not in the doldrums, just a reflective moment. I'm right here with you-all, bobbing like a cork, staying visible and doing well. We need you in this drive because it's taking off any minute now. Success is within our reach! We are our own success! Let me hear a rip-roaring Amen!

Searching For The Great Unknown

I've decided to announce that I'm on a search for The Great Unknown. I've been searching for a little while now, something like three days. It suddenly occurred to me, I might be able to find it!

When you launch a search like this, it's a big deal, because you go up and down in your optimism. Sometimes you're very optimistic, then not very optimistic, then you can be downright pessimistic. It's probably no secret that I've run the gamut. Today, actually, I'm fairly optimistic, which explains why I've suddenly decided to go public.

I woke up today, like most days, taking stock of my feelings, mood, and outlook. And guess what; it was two thumbs up on every account. I felt good, went to the kitchen and made coffee, checked the news online, then immediately picked up the search. The Great Unknown has to be somewhere! So it was a good morning, marred only by one nagging question, whether I should call it a "search" or a "quest." But I put it out of my mind, thinking, the first thing I thought of was search, not quest, so search is good enough.

That was actually a breakthrough that, upon reflection, helped my confidence. Because when you do anything, searching or questing, if you start having second thoughts or doubts, it can kill you. You have to do it right, Go with your gut. Go with your first instinct. Some of the earliest explorers probably had the same conviction, which is how they managed to eventually discover all the continents.

But I'm looking for something a lot more nebulous, something that might not be right there in plain sight, and that's going to be tougher, The Great Unknown. Just to spell it out like that gives me pause, because What is it? What do we really know about it? Two things: It's Great and it's Unknown. But is it absolutely Unknown? If it is, how do we know it's Great? The answer to that has to be, It must be Great if it remains yet Unknown, and yet is apparently findable.

Now, where to look, that's the question. And how to know when I've found it, that's another problem. I honestly don't know the answers to those questions completely. But I'm thinking, it might pay rich dividends not to leave home too quickly. Because there's lots of things to delve into, the main one being the chance that the answer is to be found within.

Think about it! My sudden desire to find The Great Unknown obviously arose from within me. I didn't have the conviction a week ago. Then one day, there it was! If it is within me, within the psyche, that will be one huge step toward finding it. Then if I'm able to come up with clues, something that narrows the field, perhaps there will be something physical somewhere out there to complete the puzzle. So, if I narrow the field psychically, then launch out on my quest -- scratch that, search -- the two just might come together in a blinding flash.

This is a search that will be ongoing. I'm not going to update the world on every aspect of my search for The Great Unknown. Two big reasons: 1) It could get boring real fast, me butting my head against the wall; And, 2) There are probably others looking for it, too, and I want to find it first. There will be big prestige in naming it after myself, and I'm guessing there will be big money groups wanting a piece of it. Like Facebook. If they gave a billion for Instagram, imagine what The Great Unknown is worth!