Monday, May 19, 2008

Grandma Slump Supports John McCain

Public Notice: The staff at the Grandma Slump blog does not support John McCain for president.

Let us be crystal clear. We will never vote for a Republican for president, especially one like John McCain who promises more of the same George W. Bush mismanagement of government (and life in general). We despise, detest, and otherwise loathe him and anyone like him. We hope he goes down to a crashing, well-deserved defeat. We will pray day and night, if that's what it takes, to make sure we are not saddled with more criminal Republican government in the United States of America.

That said, Grandma Slump herself supports John McCain. It is something in her psyche, no doubt. And despite our own complete loathing of John McCain and the Republicans in general, we still love Grandma Slump no matter how misguided she is politically. But you see Grandma Slump was raised in an era in which you looked up to your elders, whoever they were.

She sees John McCain as a true American hero and reports that she has followed his career ever since she was just a little girl. But Grandma Slump, being the sweetheart she is, says she would like John McCain even if he weren't so old. As she puts it, "I was also for Herbert Hoover because he was such a nice boy."

Grandma Slump's opinions are respected at this website, but she is merely a figurehead. She has no leadership position. Nor will she have. There will be no endorsement of John McCain! We own the rights to her name and image, as she sold them to us in exchange for nursing home insurance. She signed them away. Yes, it has been alleged that one of us was guiding her hand when she signed the form. But that's all in the past. What is done is done, and the signature looks authentic.

John McCain for president? Not in this lifetime!

No comments: