Wednesday, July 8, 2009

The Hiatus Gold Standard

I came down to earth for a few minutes yesterday -- descending from my citadel -- to check things out and make sure I'm still on the same page with the rest of existence. It turned out I was.

While I was down, I decided to look online for a few minutes and check out what kind of internet chatter there was about me being on hiatus. Any comments on the blog. In the few minutes I looked I couldn't find anything. It seems that the big news -- something about Michael Jackson -- was drowning out everything else. That and I believe I read they discovered a new species of tic in the Everglades. When I come in I check my head for tics everyday, so I can't believe I didn't discover this one ... Sometimes my diligent efforts actually pay off ... except I'm not anywhere near the Everglades, which would be key in this particular discovery.

So that's what the chatter was all about.

But in my Googling, in just a few minutes I was stunned to see that other people are also on hiatus. I'm like, What? Can this be happening? Are they mocking me? I looked a little more closely and it didn't seem to be directed toward me. None of the telltale signs of mockery were evident. Such as twisted quotes, parallel themes, or parody graphics. And mockery that's worth the name has to be direct enough that you know what they're mocking. I didn't see any evidence whatsoever that these people had a grudge against me or were poking fun. Further, they weren't fleshing out their efforts, so after a minute's reflection I came to a definite conclusion, that my hiatus and their hiatuses are nothing but a coincidence.

It's their lack of fleshing out what's going on that hit me. These people have to be really really down, really burnt out, really up against the wall as far as being worn out, haggard beyond the abilities of sleep to help them, or something. To just go on hiatus or be on hiatus without really fleshing it out as far as reasons and full explanation is something, as Nixon said when he took his hiatus from the presidency (which turned quickly into permanent retirement), is "abhorrent to every bone in my body," and that includes one or two that should not be mentioned.

Here's what I found:

William said: "I’m just not in the mood anymore to update this blog, so I will put it on hold for the time being. I will not delete it that’s for sure but I don’t know when I’ll be updating it again. It could be tomorrow, it could be next week or next month. Maybe I’ll never update it again. I just don’t feel like blogging right now. Maybe it is because of the heat, maybe it is because I need something else in my life right now. I am quite happy for the moment but still miss something very important, but overall I’m OK. See you all in the near future."

That's very interesting to me. He's not in the mood for updates so he's putting it on hold. Updates could be tomorrow, but since it's possible they could come next month or maybe never, I'm not expecting much tomorrow (which would be today). He says it might be because of the heat or some deeper personal need, although he is "quite happy for the moment." And so forth. That's a fairly detailed explanation, but as far as I'm concerned is still well below par.

Next is an entry from Roland. Roland makes William sound like another William, Shakespeare. He entitled his post simply "Hiatus," then says, "...on hols, little access to computer. More news soon!" I'm looking at that and I see the word "hols," which my mind corrects to "hold," since the D is right next to the S on the keyboard and I don't know any word called "hols." So all Roland is saying is that things are "on hold," that he has "little access to computer," and promises more news soon. Very simple. (I expect better.)

Next is someone who has a fansite for a celebrity named Demi Levato or something like that. I'm quoting this just because I've got it, not that it's an interesting hiatus post. She, I'm thinking, says, "the site is on hiatus it would be back soon. Please click here to enter my new site". Nothing to this post.

Hasslington is also on hiatus, and gives more detail, like William: "It's the summer, I'm back in school (as a student) after losing my teaching job, and I'm in the process of trying to figure out where I go from this point forward. Obviously, attempting to find another job is high on my list of priorities." So we wish Hasslington well, both at finding another job and at learning to write a better hiatus announcement. Although we give good marks for relative detail.

And one other. From Jessica, at deerwomen, which sounds intriguing to a lonely old buck like me, "DeerWomen is currently on hiatus. We are working hard and will come back with an explosion of great articles and lots of divine pieces for you!" Now there's a promise! Their hiatus is nothing long lasting because they're working hard and promising an "explosion" of great articles. They're not settled into the hiatus, which gives hope to the rest of us.

My goal is not to be super critical. Not everyone gives their hiatus the full attention it's due. And I understand that. Everyone has their own thing. Were it not for me being so sensitive to every detail of life, perhaps I too could shortchange my hiatus. But that will not happen. I'm about ready to reascend back to my citadel, to mull over and otherwise tend to my hiatus and its needs. Because what I'm dealing with here is the gold standard of hiatuses.

There's been no other like it -- according to the Googling I've done -- and unless I myself am reincarnated as a four armed typist with two brains I don't believe it will ever be topped.

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