Thursday, January 29, 2009

Local Man Grooms Himself

I'm up with the ants today. Felt a stiff draft coming through the cracks around the window. I stuffed toilet paper in there but it must have rotted. Tried to pull the covers up but they were frozen at the foot of the bed. Always something, but winter is never forgiving.

Felt a strange tickle in my ear. I'm getting that more and more. Picked in there with my fingernail to loosen up some crumbs and pull them out. I could use a Handiwipe about now but no one's looking, flick it past my sheets toward the wall.

Now I'm up, bracing, need to stoke up the fire in the stove. Put on some tea and settle in for the morning. Get comfy, if I can. Heat up some water for bathing. Wash my face, arrange my comb over after getting it wet.

Grooming chores. There's never an end to it. You want to look nice, smell nice. A little Aqua Velva, two rubs of stick deodorant, some hair gel, generic Oil of Olay for the pores on my nose, check out the wrinkles, still there.

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