Thursday, June 30, 2011

The Mincemeat Maker

I'm not a violent person but I feel like making mincemeat of someone. Or some thing, be it animal, vegetable, or mineral. A quick haymaker to the gut, then a bunch of piercing jabs, the old one-two, a little bit of chop-chop, a couple of suplexes, and you've got a pile of mincemeat. With maybe some pants on the floor where his feet used to be.

A picture that comes to me is an old professional wrestler, stomping around the ring, yelling for the dressing room for his enemy to come out, to stand before him. Then he grabs the microphone and they're face to face, while he yells and spits his way to a rumble, "I'm going to make mincemeat out of you!" The enemy can stand it no longer and looks to the crowd, always ready for blood. He turns his back and WHACK! ... there's a chop to his neck from behind. The Mincemeat Maker is at work, making mincemeat!

Probably no one knows this about me, but I'm a heck of a Wii Tennis player. I've risen to the highest level, having hit the magic 2399 mark, and doing so by making mincemeat of Elisa and Sarah. Still, they're pretty good, and sometimes it seems like they get better. But if I'm wide awake and alert, I get in some terrific shots and make mincemeat of them. Although, I'm going to be truthful, if I'm off my game, someone's trying to talk to me, someone's wanting something, then they're making mincemeat of me. But if anyone in real life distracts me like that, I get my revenge by making mincemeat of them. I hate to be distracted...

This is the law of the jungle, you're either making mincemeat or being made mincemeat out of. There doesn't seem to be any middle ground. The middle ground is where we put the mincemeat. A lot of people die in the course of a day. They're mincemeat. But the rest of us somehow stay alive. We're not mincemeat, yet, in that ultimate sense. So far I've done pretty well, I'm not mincemeat.

Still, you wake up, and bellow outside about making mincemeat of someone. Like I said at the top, I'm looking around, scouting the horizon, I want to make mincemeat of someone!

No comments: