I cannot be long with you, my friends, for today I am spending my time (for the most part) in a great celebration of ME.
That's what self-esteem is all about, kicking out the personal jams, and seeing everything gel in your own favor.
So what do I think of ME? [Pumping fist] "USA! USA! USA!" A stagehand has loosened the seams of this T-shirt, which I now will split out of.
I am radiant light (I could blind you). I am robed in satin (cool feeling on a cold day). I am balancing a sacred back scratcher on my knee.
My body is completely shaved. I have a circular spot on the top of my head tattooed with a picture of me. The rest of my body, no tattoos.
I'm infusing every cell of my being with the encouragement of self-esteem mantras ... "I am worth as much as the next guy, possibly more."
A piece of trivia. I'm wondering if anyone can tell me what this advertising slogan is from: "(Ding, ding)...It's a gas." Googling allowed.
Of course I'm worth more than the next guy. The next guy is a complete rat.
All right, that's it. I'm off to "The Celebration Of Me." (Ding, ding) ... It's a gas.
UPDATE: The answer to the trivia question, whose advertising slogan the bell and "It's a gas" was, is Pester gas stations. Also known as Pester-Derby, and I believe Derby before that. '70s vintage jingle: "Pester (ding, ding) ... It's a gas." Pester was pronounced PEE-stir. The "ding ding" was the sound of driving into a gas station and driving over the thing (cable or cord) that rang a bell inside to notify the attendant.